A True Father
I recently read and article from www.agapepress.org (its world news from a christian perspective). The article was called "Fatherhood is More Than a Paycheck" and it discussed how sports icons we know and love basically ignore their responsibilties as fathers. The 1998 Sports Illustrated article focused on former Boston Celtics forward Greg Minor's son Khalid who at the time was 2yrs old (now 7) and how his basic needs were ignored along with his mom and siblings to the point where they were evicted from their home because he refused to make child support payments. Another part of the article discussed former NY Knicks forward Larry Johnson who has five children (four different mothers) and then there's the enigmatic Shawn Kemp (formerly of the Cleveland Cavs, Seattle Sonics) who has 7 kids with "multiple" partners as the article eluded to. Lastly, we have one of the greatest basketball players to ever grace the hardwood (besides Michael Jordan and Magic Johnson). And that person would be former Boston Celtic great Larry Bird, who incidently has a teenage daughter whom according to the article "he does not acknowledge"?
Now I ask, "what is wrong with this picture"?. Well, I'm glad that you asked......The article also referred to former Philadelphia Eagles player Anthony Edwards and what differentiated him from these other three so-called fathers was the fact that he took "responsibility" for his choice to have a child. Like many of the aformentioned, he was a young promising wide receiver at a small jr. college in New Mexico and the last thing he needed was a baby, but instead of shirking his responsibility he in turn did the "right" thing. He quit school and got a job making $6.50 an hr. (how rare is that these days). His girlfriend moved into his parents' house and they slept in "seperate" bedrooms (Wow, what a kid!). Now he could have easily blown her off and pursued his pro football career, but again he did the right thing.
In 1989 he did make it to the NFL and played for the Philadelphia Eagles, signing as a free agent. He married (Mary Ann) in 1990 and they committed themselves to the raising of the child "T-O-G-E-T-H-E-R". He felt a need to "take care of his child, because he was "his" flesh and blood......Hmmmm! Nice! There was staggering statistic referred to in this article. It said that from 1960-1995 the percentage of single-parent homes tripled by a whopping 27%. while the proportion of children living with married parents "declined". Today, 24 million children or 34% live without their biological father. In 2000, 1.35 million births or 1/3 of all births, were out of wedlock. On that note, star basketball player LeBron James of the Cleveland Cavs, has a baby by his girlfriend out of wedlock, but appears so far to have accepted his responsiblity as a father and role model to many adoring fans.
The problem that I have with all of this is that we are consistently putting these sports stars on pedestals (yes, even I have done it) without realizing that while some of them are tremendous athletes, they are still just human like the rest of us and have a "moral" responsiblity to do the right thing all the time. Most of the dead beat dad's in sports come from the NBA (not surprising to this writer when you consider the outlandish amounts of money thrown at these very immature young men) They apparently don't know what to do with all that money, so they begin to blow it on unecessary purchases such as jewelry (bling-bling), overpriced homes and car(s). Now don't get me wrong, it's nothing wrong with having things............. as long as the things don't have you. Scripture tells us that the "love of money" is the root of evil. Many of these sports stars come from less than perfect homes that featured single moms that worked many jobs just to support the family so that their sons could pursue their sports dreams, and often the sons go and purchase them new homes, cars, etc. Many of these stars also give back to their respective communities, which is a great thing, but who's there to teach them about the accountability and responsibility that comes with all that talent and money.
That's why many of your high school players are now leaving their senior year of high school, forgoing college and taking on the pro game. Which is faster paced, along with a lifestyle that is nothing short of the same. So as they see the dollars signs, so do the groupies. These new superstars get involved with these ladies and boom, there's a brand new life to reckon with. As I stated before, are these guys truly ready for the accountability and more importantly the responsibilty of laying down with these women? Now, I'm sure there are some who genuinely fall in love with these men and "do the right thing", but I'm referring to those who see the dollar signs and the "no commitment"written on the forehead of some of these athletes. Many times children are born out of "one-night stands"! This is a frightening, vicious cycle to say the least. Its not the fault of the child in how they were conceived, because scripture tells us that "children are a blessing from the Lord. Pity that some of these fathers don't realize that. Many of these "ladies" use their bodies and other allurements to entice these men into sexual relationships just to get pregnant and then demand child support, which I guess they are unfortunately entitled to. But its the motives of some of these women that I have a problem with. They are more than aware of the "possibilities" of getting pregnant and in their small minds they figure "he's got money, I'm set for the rest of my life".......or so they think.
The bottom line is this...."Fathers do matter. They matter a lot." (J. Jimenez, Agape Press, 2005) There is nothing in this world that can replace the presence of a father in a home. No fancy car (Hummer2 or 3), beach front house, multi-million/year contract with incentives can replace the guidance of a father in the lives of their kids. I was one of those kids whose dad left because he wasn't man enough to stick it out for the long haul and work the issues of life with my mom. My mom did the best that she could to raise me the right way and I think she did a fantastic job, considering. But had my father been there for me, teaching me, guiding me, helping to become a man. Many of the issues that I faced would have been a lot easier to deal with because he would have been there to get me through each and every one. After all what does a mom really know about being a man.......?
Now I have 3 boys. They are 10, 4 and 2. That's three boys! I have a tremendous responsiblity along with my wife to raise them right. Scripture tells us as believers in Jesus Christ to "train a child up in the way that they should go, so that when they grow old, they will NOT turn from it". In other words if we as parents period would train our children in the right way, when they grow older hopefully they will make good and moral judgements and have productive lives. Anthony Edwards is the example of a "true father", but I'm sure that he would be the first to admit that he's not perfect and that he has made mistakes. But I also can guarantee that he has relied on the grace and power of God to get him through. Anthony made the right choices at the right time, but more importantly he took the "responsibility" to be a TRUE FATHER......
Next: True Fatherhood (Pt.2)
Now I ask, "what is wrong with this picture"?. Well, I'm glad that you asked......The article also referred to former Philadelphia Eagles player Anthony Edwards and what differentiated him from these other three so-called fathers was the fact that he took "responsibility" for his choice to have a child. Like many of the aformentioned, he was a young promising wide receiver at a small jr. college in New Mexico and the last thing he needed was a baby, but instead of shirking his responsibility he in turn did the "right" thing. He quit school and got a job making $6.50 an hr. (how rare is that these days). His girlfriend moved into his parents' house and they slept in "seperate" bedrooms (Wow, what a kid!). Now he could have easily blown her off and pursued his pro football career, but again he did the right thing.
In 1989 he did make it to the NFL and played for the Philadelphia Eagles, signing as a free agent. He married (Mary Ann) in 1990 and they committed themselves to the raising of the child "T-O-G-E-T-H-E-R". He felt a need to "take care of his child, because he was "his" flesh and blood......Hmmmm! Nice! There was staggering statistic referred to in this article. It said that from 1960-1995 the percentage of single-parent homes tripled by a whopping 27%. while the proportion of children living with married parents "declined". Today, 24 million children or 34% live without their biological father. In 2000, 1.35 million births or 1/3 of all births, were out of wedlock. On that note, star basketball player LeBron James of the Cleveland Cavs, has a baby by his girlfriend out of wedlock, but appears so far to have accepted his responsiblity as a father and role model to many adoring fans.
The problem that I have with all of this is that we are consistently putting these sports stars on pedestals (yes, even I have done it) without realizing that while some of them are tremendous athletes, they are still just human like the rest of us and have a "moral" responsiblity to do the right thing all the time. Most of the dead beat dad's in sports come from the NBA (not surprising to this writer when you consider the outlandish amounts of money thrown at these very immature young men) They apparently don't know what to do with all that money, so they begin to blow it on unecessary purchases such as jewelry (bling-bling), overpriced homes and car(s). Now don't get me wrong, it's nothing wrong with having things............. as long as the things don't have you. Scripture tells us that the "love of money" is the root of evil. Many of these sports stars come from less than perfect homes that featured single moms that worked many jobs just to support the family so that their sons could pursue their sports dreams, and often the sons go and purchase them new homes, cars, etc. Many of these stars also give back to their respective communities, which is a great thing, but who's there to teach them about the accountability and responsibility that comes with all that talent and money.
That's why many of your high school players are now leaving their senior year of high school, forgoing college and taking on the pro game. Which is faster paced, along with a lifestyle that is nothing short of the same. So as they see the dollars signs, so do the groupies. These new superstars get involved with these ladies and boom, there's a brand new life to reckon with. As I stated before, are these guys truly ready for the accountability and more importantly the responsibilty of laying down with these women? Now, I'm sure there are some who genuinely fall in love with these men and "do the right thing", but I'm referring to those who see the dollar signs and the "no commitment"written on the forehead of some of these athletes. Many times children are born out of "one-night stands"! This is a frightening, vicious cycle to say the least. Its not the fault of the child in how they were conceived, because scripture tells us that "children are a blessing from the Lord. Pity that some of these fathers don't realize that. Many of these "ladies" use their bodies and other allurements to entice these men into sexual relationships just to get pregnant and then demand child support, which I guess they are unfortunately entitled to. But its the motives of some of these women that I have a problem with. They are more than aware of the "possibilities" of getting pregnant and in their small minds they figure "he's got money, I'm set for the rest of my life".......or so they think.
The bottom line is this...."Fathers do matter. They matter a lot." (J. Jimenez, Agape Press, 2005) There is nothing in this world that can replace the presence of a father in a home. No fancy car (Hummer2 or 3), beach front house, multi-million/year contract with incentives can replace the guidance of a father in the lives of their kids. I was one of those kids whose dad left because he wasn't man enough to stick it out for the long haul and work the issues of life with my mom. My mom did the best that she could to raise me the right way and I think she did a fantastic job, considering. But had my father been there for me, teaching me, guiding me, helping to become a man. Many of the issues that I faced would have been a lot easier to deal with because he would have been there to get me through each and every one. After all what does a mom really know about being a man.......?
Now I have 3 boys. They are 10, 4 and 2. That's three boys! I have a tremendous responsiblity along with my wife to raise them right. Scripture tells us as believers in Jesus Christ to "train a child up in the way that they should go, so that when they grow old, they will NOT turn from it". In other words if we as parents period would train our children in the right way, when they grow older hopefully they will make good and moral judgements and have productive lives. Anthony Edwards is the example of a "true father", but I'm sure that he would be the first to admit that he's not perfect and that he has made mistakes. But I also can guarantee that he has relied on the grace and power of God to get him through. Anthony made the right choices at the right time, but more importantly he took the "responsibility" to be a TRUE FATHER......
Next: True Fatherhood (Pt.2)
posted by Ray at 11:46 PM
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